Someone once said to me “you are not designed to have dreams you cannot fulfill”.
I know this to be true from what I have witnessed in my life. The caveat is that there has to be pure unobstructed faith in the dream, and alignment to the virtues that the house of true dreams lives by.
A true dream is one that is inclusive of all Life.
It took me a long time to move towards this alignment and get the false dreams out of my head. It is far from perfect as many parts of my life are still reliant upon the structures of destruction. The little hypocrisies of driving a car and charging money for wisdom and medicine of the Earth are unavoidable as of this moment.
I did not choose an easy path. I am a salmon. I swim in the direction of my true calling which is in the opposite direction of the majority mindset around dreaming, success, wealth and worth.
The unavoidable truth in me has kept me attuned to something other than the rules of society. That truth is that I came to help. That somewhere deep down I knew I did not dream what I was seeing all around me.
I know why I am here. I have seen my first birth and my contracts. Being a full fledge fleshy human is an honor. I am the portal of which dream becomes destiny. I have the unique ability, as a human, to discern and make decisions from the center of my heart. I am blessed, in the face of a deeply challenging personal and collective narrative, to even be able to dream and feel all the feelings.
When I was a young teen I left the house of my childhood due to unlivable conditions. I was exiled from family. As I journeyed forward, the scarring from childhood then exiled me from the world. I see this now as a gift. Had I found belonging in the world I would likely be too entrenched to hear my Soul’s yearning, and would potentially still be stuck in one of the many addiction cycles available as byproduct of living inside a model that knows not of a good and true dream.
I have forever been seeking home. I sense deep down almost everyone has. The displacement traumas of my ancestors, and of the ancestors and native peoples of the lands I now inhabit, are deeply imbedded in the collective nervous system of which we are all a part.
The last decade has put me face to face with numerous initiations to reclaim my inner sanctuary and innate belonging as a child of the Great Mother- indigenous, welcome and at home simply by my being born. By my choosing to inhabit this miraculous life.
It is time to marry the land and bring the gift and home I have resurrected within me to a physical space and share the bounty. I am not here to “own” what should never be owned. I seek partnership with a small corner of land that I tend outright with no owing to financial institutions. I seek partnership in this dream with others who align with Earth first virtues. I seek creative and out of the box solutions that open up potential for another way to live in support of one another.
Throughout the last many years tending the deep feminine mysteries I have come to a Truth…
When the feminine body is in alignment, unobstructed and tending the good Earth under her feet, then all of creation spirals into balance. Communities orient back into balance. Families balance. When women, get the good Earth under their feet again, a cascade of memory floods their systems with the remembrance of the dream. That first dream. The dream of Life.
This little corner of land will be dedicated to that remembering for the people- through the women. It will be a sanctuary for those in exile from the world in order to find the Earth again.
A place where I can put my loving hands on the bodies and help the intuition awaken again. To help birth a forgotten vision. To write the words of She into form. To love and tend my family and community.
Our society teaches much about how to live in the world it created and nothing about how to live Life on and with the Earth. People, for the most part, do not have Life skills.
This will be a sanctuary of regenerative medicine.
I see a few structures on the land to house those in need of deep restoration. Because of my intimate journey through addiction- I see a longer vision of a place of integration for those women who are post rehabilitation programs and still need that missing piece of wholeness; not a life of coping skills. It is still materializing within me and will come to life when the parts are in place.
The land must inform me. This cannot be about my will force being thrust upon a space. The first part of every dream is listening and inclusion for the greater good of all living things.
A space my family and I can gift to other weary travelers when the call to tend our soul’s journey comes in and takes us to other lands for a time.
It will be a space where I need little of the world so I can give much of the Earth. Where I write books that help your great great grandchildren.
There will be fire. There will be water. There will be nourishing things that grow from deeply tended soil. There will be a House of Faithful Devotion for anyone in the community to come find solace.
Am I forming a collective?
First, I need to root in a house. As my Grandmother says, “go feather your nest”. I have spent so many years helping others get the good Earth under their feet that it’s time for me to sew mine firm to my path. Then the rest of dream will materialize from there.
I am a generative force. I am an abundant force. I am a balanced feminine force. I am restorative by nature. I am a creative force. I am a visionary force that sees a day that the Wisdom Keepers are once again supported by the community and land that they tend.
May this home that seeks me become a monument of prayer by my presence- so that whoever sets foot upon it remembers that there was a people who honored the Earth’s turning.
When all structures upon this land are consumed by the fungi of regeneration- 7 generations from now- there will still, and forever, be a song to capture in the whistling Wind of new Trees upon the new Earth.
This dream chose me. I am not special. But I am unique in that I believe in all of my heart that there is an equally unique series of events waiting to catalyze this vision. And, like any properly quested vision, it is to be brought forth for the people to remember how to dream as one again.
I came to help. And, hey, if I don’t ask then the answer is always no.
A stepping stone of a small home would suffice to begin and then something that perfectly fits my family and my community in what we all need to bring forth our gifts.
Close to water. Lots of light. On the Olympic Peninsula in the Port Townsend area. In Oaxaca Mexico.
Financially I have a small, small amount to put forth for this dream. I believe it is enough of a seed for someone, besides myself, to believe in me.
This is not my vision alone. Thank you for sharing it far and wide. May we all live in the gift.